61 and going to college – What was I thinking!

Okay, maybe this is irrelevant to you but for me, going to college is a dream come true. I am in my last year of working on my bachelor’s degree, and only have four classes to go before I have the degree. I have learned over the past four years that learning at 61 is not the same as learning at 18. What I could do when I was young comes very hard now that I’m older. No, I am not complaining. I am so very glad I made the decision to fulfill a lifetime dream.

I started this journey on July 28, 2010. I received my Associate’s Degree of Art in Psychology July 10, 2010 and will have my Bachelor’s of Science Degree in Psychology July 29, 2012 (last day of class). I have learned so much about myself and about others. I have learned that I can accomplish, and I am not as dumb as my children thought I was. I work hard to maintain my GPA (3.97 of a 4.0 measure). One thing I have learned is I love to learn. Now, I am confronted with a dilemna. Do I go on to get my Master’s degree or do I stop and get a job using my newly earned degree. One part of me says go on; one part says stop. My college is encouraging me to proceed, my husband says to wait, my heart says proceed, my mind says stop. I have three months to make up my mind. I’m not sure what I will decide.

A Master’s degree is another two years. I will be 64 if I proceed when I receive that degree. From my Master’s I can proceed to my PhD; I would be 66 – 68. Do I really want to keep going? Should I keep going? Would it benefit me to keep going? Would it benefit my family? What kind of example would it set for my grandchildren? Can I do it?! So many questions and no answers.

So, here it is Saturday night and all I want to do is open up the textbook and keep reading, but my brain is tired. My husband is ready to have his wife back. I realized tonight he will be 80 yrs old in 7 years. He doesn’t look that old. He doesn’t act that old. Should I spend my time with him instead of studying? He prefers to watch TV unless we are driving around. Who can afford the gas to drive around?! Okay, I’m rambling so I am going to quit writing. One day…maybe…I’ll figure out What The Heck Was I thinking!


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